3 Life Lessons from Captain Marvel

Have you ever been told you’re “too emotional” or “too weak”? Have you ever wondered who you are or felt held back from who you could be? In this post we’ll discuss this, as well as 3 major lessons we can learn from Captain Marvel.

I’d like to give a shout out to Sara and Alex for discussing the movie with me and sharing their thoughts to help me in writing this post. I am so thankful for them! Alex is a fellow blogger, so make sure to check out his website for hilarious satire pieces, creative short stories, poems, and reviews!

***SPOILER ALERT: This post contains spoilers!***

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From the very beginning and throughout the movie Carol is constantly told she’s “too emotional” or “too weak” and that she needs to let go of her emotions to become her best self.

1. In the training scene with Yon-Rogg. He tells her she must control her emotions and her power. He even says her humor is a distraction, and anger serves the enemy. Now, if you listen to all the things he says in this scene, there’s actually a lot of truth to it, so I can see why Carol could believe him. We SHOULD learn to control our emotions…however, there seems to be implication here that he doesn’t just want her to control her emotions but push them aside completely because ANY emotion is weakness.

2. In Carol’s talk with the Supreme Intelligence, who says, “You struggle with your emotions—with your past that fuels them.” Again, there could be a bit of truth to this—we shouldn’t let ourselves be held back or defined by our pasts…however, the Supreme Intelligence doesn’t want her to understand her past so she can resolve her issues and move on. No. The Supreme Intelligence seems to want her to to avoid her past completely….which should be bringing up some major red flags! I mean, any counseling or psychology class could tell you that it’s better to deal with your past and your emotions rather than avoiding them and suppressing them. Bad things tend to happen when you suppress or repress feelings and memories.

3. During her flashback of memories growing up and during her training. Constantly being told she’s “not strong enough” or that she can’t do it.

4. Again in her mind with the Supreme Intelligence. She’s told she’s only human and she responds, “You’re right. I’m only human.” We see Carol standing up and flashbacks of all the times throughout her life when she got back up and persevered even when it didn’t make sense and even when people kept telling her to give up! And then there’s the epic quote of “I’ve been fighting with one hand tied behind my back, but what happens when I’m set free?”

5. In the final “fight” scene with Yon. In his last desperate attempt to control her, he tells Carol to prove to him that she can defeat him without her powers because he knows there’s NO WAY he could stand a chance against her in the fullness of who she is and all the power she has. But Carol uses her power to defeat him in just one blow and says, “I have nothing to prove to you.” BOOM.

 

So let’s take a look at what lessons we can learn from Captain Marvel.

1. Emotions are not weakness, and they can be your greatest strength.

In our culture, emotions have often been considered weakness, especially by men. Women are constantly being told they’re too emotional and, therefore, can’t be taken seriously. It’s become a JOKE to some men. It’s not just a problem for women though. Men are often told to “man up” when they display any kind of sensitive feelings. However, I think it takes a STRONG man to be confident enough in himself to be able to cry in front of others. I don’t think any less of a man for it; in fact, I admire him all the more. He becomes STRONGER in my eyes. The men I’ve seen in my life who I consider to be the strongest have been men who care enough about something or someone enough to cry. As Brené Brown teaches—vulnerability takes courage and strength.

I’ve mostly had women in mind while writing this because the main character is a woman, and women do tend to have to deal with this issue way more than men (because they’re not just told they’re too emotional when they cry, but also when they get passionate or angry—qualities that are often blindly praised in men). But there’s definitely application for men here too.

One display of this theme with men is in the scene where Coulson let Fury go, despite his orders. Fury later discusses the event with Carol, saying that Coulson went with his emotions rather than protocol—it made him human. And if you’re someone who watches Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (I LOVE IT!), you know that Coulson will often choose what he feels to be RIGHT over following orders or what seems to be logical. His deep care for others is his STRENGTH, and time and time again we see his emotions not as weakness but working for his good and the good of those around him.

Emotions aren’t always weakness; they can be strength.

2. To become the best you, you must know who you are.

Yon-Rogg tells Carol that he wants to help her become “a better you.” As an INFJ who believes my purpose is to help people grow and become their best selves, I resonated with this…Unfortunately, we find out that Yon doesn’t truly want her to become a better her; he wants her to become a better her HE CAN CONTROL. He wants her to be the person HE wants her to be. Everything he tells her—from controlling her emotions and her power to not pursuing her past—is all to gain more power over her.

Have you ever met a manipulator like that? Someone who tries to make you believe he has your best interest in mind, but in reality he is twisting the truth to gain better control of you and mold you into the submissive plaything he wants you to be for his own selfish gain.

Yon and the Supreme Intelligence tell her she needs to forget her past and who she was if she is to become her best self, when that is the opposite of the truth.

It made me so happy to see this as a theme in Captain Marvel because IT’S THE VERY THING MY WHOLE BLOG IS BASED AROUND! The idea that the more you KNOW about yourself, the more you can GROW. A growing understand of self is the KEY to personal growth. How can you accomplish much without knowing your strengths and weaknesses? How can you reach your goals if you don’t know what works for you and what doesn’t? How can you figure out your purpose in life if you don’t even know who you are?

We see this in Captain Marvel. The moment she learns who she really is is the moment she steps into her true power. She was lied to about her strengths and weaknesses, and she finally realizes the strength she has had this whole time. “I’ve been fighting with one hand tied behind my back, but what happens when I’m set free?”

My friend, what have you tied behind your back? What things have you been falsely viewing as weakness? Is it your emotions—being told “man up”, “men don’t cry”, or “you’re too emotional”? Is it your introversion—being told to “speak up,” “get out more”, “stop being such an introvert,” and believing that extroversion is the personality to be desired over your own? Is it your gender—being looked down on, having your emotions dismissed as invalid, or having your opinions respected less because you’re a woman?

But what if the very thing you thought (and have been told) was weakness, is actually your greatest STRENGTH? My friend, it’s time to untie that hand from behind your back and be set free!

When I untied introversion from behind my back, learned about who I am, and stopped trying to be who other people said I should be, that’s when I became my better self. I became so much stronger. When I leaned into my introvert strengths, that’s when I became more successful and was able to help people way more than I ever could before!

You must know who you are in order to become your best self.

3. Surround yourself with true friends who can remind you who you are.

I love the scene when Carol tells Talos that she doesn’t know who she is, and her friend, Maria, steps in with a beautiful and powerful speech to tell her who she is. Maria declares who she knows her to be and this strengthens Carol.

I am so incredibly grateful for the friends in my life who have reminded me who I am when I’ve felt discouraged or doubted my capabilities. I don’t know what I would have done without them. We all go through struggles in our lives and can easily forget who we are or fail to see our own strength and beauty. We all need that person when we stray from the truth. So find yourself a trustworthy friend who can remind you who you are.

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Share your thoughts in the comments below!

What did you think of the movie? What were your key takeaways? Did any of these lessons from Captain Marvel resonate with you on an emotional level? I’d love to hear it and have a conversation with you, so comment below!

Want to check out my other lessons from film posts?

• Lessons from Spider-Man: Far From Home
• Lessons from Avengers: Endgame
• 3 Life Lessons from Shazam!
• 9 Life Lessons from Wonder Woman
• Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life Lesson
• 4 Life Lessons from Doctor Strange
• A Lesson on Strength from Star Trek Beyond
• 6 Life Lessons We Can Learn from Captain America: Civil War
• 6 Life Lessons We Can Learn from Batman v Superman