Were you ever impacted by the popularity contest in school? Perhaps it wasn’t so bad at your school…or perhaps it didn’t seem so bad because you were actually in the popular clique. Perhaps you were one of the many who tried to change yourself to fit in. Perhaps you felt like you never fit in.
For anyone who has ever been impacted by the “popularity contest”, especially if you’re currently in the midst of it, this post is for you, my friend.
This post originally appeared on Anna’s 1st blog, Annamotion.
After graduating from college I returned to my hometown for a few weeks. On a friend-date at the popular local ice-cream shop, my friend mentioned a couple of names from high school…and though I recognized the names, I couldn’t even think of who she was talking about! I couldn’t even picture a face!
That night I looked through my high school yearbook from senior year and even used it to look up some of my old classmates on Facebook (those whom I hadn’t stayed connected with). As I read the names with the faces of my graduation class of 2012 I realized that I hadn’t thought of hardly any of them in almost 4 years! On top of that, at least a third of the people who were once considered the “popular” kids now looked almost completely unfamiliar to me (“DID YOU EVEN GO HERE?”)! I hardly could remember who they were!
However…
The people I did remember (other than, of course, the few I stayed connected with) were those who showed kindness–those who were positive lights at school. We may not have interacted much during high school, but they always were inclusive, welcoming, and kind. Popularity seemed like such a big deal in high school!…but now, those who sought popularity are long forgotten and those who didn’t try to be cool but instead weren’t afraid to be themselves and show kindness and a welcoming hand to all–THEY are the ones who live on in my memory.
If any highschoolers are reading this, I know it’s hard to see it now, but, trust me. As someone who is just 4 years out from having graduated high school, when you’re graduating college or have at least a few years of distance from high school, this will all be a distant memory. You may even (as I did) look up a popular high school kid on Facebook in the future and see that their high school “glory days” got them nowhere in life and it may even be some of those overlooked who are now the successful and happy ones.
So don’t be discouraged. Be someone who is popular of heart–someone who helps all to feel welcome and included and valued. No person is greater than another. Be who you are and be kind.
Someone just might remember you forever.
My challenge to you…
What can you do today to break down your own clique-y walls? I’m not just talking to students here; I know the exclusion of others doesn’t end once you become an “adult”! How can you be sensitive to those around you and help them to feel seen, valued, and welcome?
Think about it as you go through your day–at school, at work, at the gym, at church, or other places you interact with others on a regular basis.
Read the other posts in this series:
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